Can the Holidays Trigger a Divorce?
Ah, the holidays—the happiest time of the year! There is caroling and lights, stockings and goodies—and good cheer to all, right? For many of us, the idyllic vision of holiday cheer is smack dab up against heavy traffic, long lines in stores, pressure from relatives, and unmet expectations. In other words, it can be a perfect combination of stressors that ultimately puts a huge strain on relationships. Perhaps that is one reason that the number of divorces filed tends to skyrocket in the months following the holidays. If the winter holidays have you thinking about divorce, a local attorney can guide you through it.
Studies consistently show that divorce filings in December are the lowest of the year. Presumably unhappy couples want to give their marriage one last shot during the holidays. Researchers suspect that if things are still not meshing, no one wants to disrupt family life at this time. In subsequent months, however, all those pent up feelings of anxiety, depression, and discontent come to the surface and lead to action. That is why the number of divorce filings consistently rises from January through March. It is simply a reaction to one or both spouses deciding that miserable holidays have become the final straw, and the differences are simply irreconcilable.
The Holidays are over. What Next?
If you have contemplated splitting up and are not quite sure how to gear up for the change, we can offer a number of suggestions to make things go more smoothly for everyone involved:
- Address the practical matters first. Figure out the basics such as your living space, temporary arrangements for the kids, and financial and scheduling issues.
- Find a divorce attorney that you trust and who listens.
- Be respectful to one another.
- Keep kids, if there are any, protected from conflict.
- Create new routines and traditions to keep yourself feeling positive.
- Make time to experience what you are feeling and work through it.
- Find a good friend for moral support.
- Avoid drowning your sorrows; instead, face the facts and focus on moving forward.
- Experience gratitude, acknowledging you have plenty to feel good about even in tough times;
- Get out of your own head by spending time at the gym, in service to others, or in creative endeavors;
- Adjust your expectations and try to accept things that are out of your control;
- Start a new hobby or join a new club;
- Avoid new romantic relationships until your marriage is behind you emotionally.
Making Life Work Again
Ultimately, your divorce is aimed at giving you back a sense of satisfaction and happiness that was somehow lost during your marriage. It will be an adjustment in many ways, but will ultimately be an opportunity for new explorations and a chance for contentment. At Beck Law P.C.,, we understand the challenges of divorce, and step up to ensure that our clients have excellent representation in order to achieve the best possible outcomes. If you live in Sonoma County, Mendocino County, or Lake County California, contact us in Santa Rosa for a confidential consultation today.